a normal school day for hunger games fans

girls gossiping:

So this girl, Jenn-
me:

JENNIFER LAWRENCE WHAT.
friends at lunch:

want some blueberries?
me:

THAT'S NIGHTLOCK! YOU'D BE DEAD IN A MINUTE! DAMN YOU!
nurse:

so i'm going to give you some sleeping pills and-
me:

um, excuse me, no. it's called sleep syrup. DUH
teacher:

is Josh here today?
me:

JOSH HUTCHERSON. WHERE IS MY HUSBAND.
health teacher:

and that is why you shouldn't do drugs or drink.
me:

haymitch does not approve.
student:

*accidently drops books on floor*
me:

I HEARD THE CANNON. WHO DIED? THOSE DARN GAMEMAKERS!
guidance counselor:

all right what careers have you thought about?
me:

i kinda just don't like them. i mean, glimmer is a bitch. cato's vicious. clove is crazy with knives. marvel killed rue.
science teacher:

today we are learning about insects. *brings out sample of bee* this is called a-
me:

WHAT ARE YOU DOING. THOSE ARE TRACKER JACKERS. THEY'RE GENETICALLY ALTERED WASPS. STOP.
lunch lady:

today we're serving pie for dessert.
me:

sorry, i only eat pastries from the Mellark Bakery.
PE coach:

*blows whistle*
me:

RUE WHERE ARE YOU???!!?!? *whistles*

x